Monday, October 25, 2010

He’s not really sorry.

 

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(refusing to walk one more step, AND refusing my offer to ride in the stroller, Joseph stages a sit-in.)

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(these are unrelated to the post, but naughty nonetheless.)

IMG_5162 .

Here is an example of what goes down at our house a million times a day:

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Joseph does something naughty. 

Not color-on-the-walls naughty (that only happens on special occasions) but something more every-day naughty like  dropping toys into the air conditioning vents.

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I ask him to stop.

He does it again.

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I tell him to stop more firmly, explaining why he shouldn’t do it (we can’t retrieve the toys, and I am pretty sure the hotel has a you-break-it-you-pay-to-repair-it policy on big expensive things like air conditioning units.)

He (without hesitation) does it again.  Or says something charming like, “NO!  I NOT STOPPING IT!”

I lose it.

Not as bad as I WANT to lose it, so kudos to me for that, but I yell and I punish.

And then I try to retreat into the kitchen or bathroom to give myself a minute to calm down before I lose it altogether.  It is amazing what a difference a minute can make to my patience level…

But it is not to be.

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Joseph follows me wherever I am.

He asks, “you happy or mad?  mama?  you happy or mad? you happy or mad…..” (repeat a million times)

I beg my inner self to hang on to my last shred of good-mama sanity.

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When I reply “ I’m a little mad Joseph because you didn’t listen to mama” he starts in.

“sorry, mama, sorry.  Sorry,  sorry.  Sorry mama!  You happy now?  You happy? sorry!  you happy?”

I thank him for his apology, but explain that I am not happy with his behavior and hope that he will refrain from disobedience  in the future.

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He has now attached himself to my body, preferably about my neck like a piece of 35-pound- groveling jewelry.

Kiss, mama.  I give you kisses.  muah! kisses!  you mad?  muah!  kisses mama!  you need space? muah!  you happy?”

I try to go about my business.

You’re PRETTY!  You’re PRETTY mama!  You happy now?  You’re super dooooooooper pretty!  You happy?”

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This usually gets me, because what gal doesn’t love compliments?, and I tell him that yes, I am now happy.

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At which point he detaches himself,

goes into the living room,

and sticks something else into the vent.

 

7 comments:

blueviolet said...

Ok, that chain of events is completely amusing to me. Not to you, obviously. But it's totally making my afternoon!

ter@waaoms said...

sucka!!!

you fell for his sweet-talk...

(I would too!)

Rachel said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I do believe mothers have the right to say they hate children every once in a while!!!! As for the compliments thing, where the heck did Joseph learn that? From Brian? Is that what Brian does when he's been naughty? Are these the posts he's refusing to let you post? Smart boy that Joseph is. If only my own children would learn to compliment me like that...

Jenners said...

I'm so sorry to be laughing so hard at this but he is a master manipulator. Be afraid ... be very afraid.

T Rex Mom said...

That sounds all too familiar...oh gosh. We go through that so many times a day. T Rex goes to time out because he deliberately looks at me and disobeys. I know they have little impulse control, but really.

Nina said...

Isn't this age wonderful? :)

septembermom said...

I have so been there with my boys. Joseph is really a sweet talker. The girls are going to love him!