-- I smell fall!! Anyone else? I can’t wait! Because
a) hooded sweatshirts make great postpartum-tummy-camouflage
b) Two words: candy corn
c) school resumes, meaning that all of our favorite hang-outs spots will be nice and deserted- just the way I like them!
But, we are squeezing the last few drops out of summer around here, as seen throughout this post.
--Brian and I have gone on TWO dates this past month, both to celebrate our anniversary (7 years!), and to stock up on happy-togetherness before the baby arrives.
(At which point I will be so tired and hormonal that I will burst into tears whenever I look at him and everything he says will make me think he thinks I look fat. I’m guessing.)
One of them included a fishing trip! Which was sooo fun!
(whoopsie! Not a fish! It was a giant crawdad!)
But probably MOSTLY only fun for me since it went a bit like this:
step 1: Brian puts the worm on the hook while I look the other way and feel slightly nauseous/teary.
step 2: Brian casts the…line?…worm? into the water while I try to tell him where to put it (“OVER THERE! I THINK I SAW A FISH OVER THERE!”)
step 3: Brian hands me the poll
step 4: I reel it in slowly
step 5: FISH ON!! I DID IT! I GOT ONE!
step 6: When it brakes the surface of the water, I avert my eyes again (fish = creeeeepy) while Brian catches it in the net
step 7: Brian kills it somehow (I don’t watch of course) and sticks on another worm.
-- An actual conversation today
Brian: “Isaac??! What is that in your mouth?”
Isaac: spits out a necklace.
Brian: “Oh no! That’s dangerous! We don’t EAT necklaces!”
Isaac: “Only Dada do’s. Only Dada eats necklaces.”
Me: “NO! No one eats necklaces!”
Isaac: “Isaac eats necklaces.”
--Sadly, yesterday was the day that Joseph finally asked me about pushing out a baby.
Until now the ol’ vague “…and then I push it out!” was working for him. (and me! I don’t need to know any more thankyouverymuch!)
But, he wanted to know HOW it comes out. “How, Mama? How do you push it out of your belly?”
So, sigh, I told him. Vaguely. VERY vaguely. As in, “Well I push it out of my bottom.”
Joseph shrieked: “Like a poop?!”
Me (nervous): “ummmm…kind of. yep. but out of my girl bottom.”
I then realized that he does not know what “girl bottom” means (advantage to having all boys!) and I averted my eyes, hoping hoping hoping that he wouldn’t ask.
First, he laughed, like noooooo.
Then I nodded like yessssss.
And then he shrieked (again): “DOESN’T THAT HURT??!”
To which I replied in the affirmative. Yep. Definitely. BUT that they can give you medicine to make it not hurt so much.
He was silent, digesting this turn of events.
I was silent, trying to make him feel open to talk to me while simultaneously wishing I was somewhere else. (preferably sleeping.) Toeing the line between repressing natural curiosity and scarring him for life.
He sighed, shook his head and said, “Let’s go wake up Dada from his nap.”
And he hasn’t mentioned it since.
(Running through the big fountain made his eyebrows shoot straight up!)
-- Speaking of waking Brian – he is home! Before the baby came out! And he avoided the most recent NYC shooting!
He sent us a video from the airport, during which he told the boys that he would be home when they woke up in the morning, and that they could, I quote “Come punch me in the head or something to wake me up and say hi!” and then he laughed...
Until 6:20 AM
when Joseph complied.