I know what you are saying right now-
Well, hello Caitlin.
Where have you been?
Why are you posting on a weekend?
Whatev, folks. My blog, my rules.
Don't rock the boat, Just enjoy the ride!
So, Jenner's Fun (or is it a Game? Both?) this week is called Genre mash-ups. You have to:
Think of two types of books/authors/stories/genres that are wildly different. Then come up with a title of a book that combines the two -- along with a sample paragraph or two.
I chose to combine the book "Twilight" by Stephanie Meyer, and a diet book.
I have never read a diet book (clearly) so I don't have a specific one in mind, any ol' one will do.
It is titled:
Twi-lite
This excerpt is from the chapter titled, Willpower:"What is that delicious smell?" You wonder, and grip your carrot stick as hard as you can.
Oh no!
A HUGE PIECE OF WARM CHOCOLATE CAKE, OOZING WITH FROSTING just came into view!!
Be strong. Don't smell it. Hold your breath if you have too.
OOOOOOHHHH, you can still smell it! You have never wanted anything more in your life!
Shhh! Quiet down. Just munch on your carrot stick. See? Isn't that tasty?!
Nope, it's disgusting! You only want that piece of cake! It's all you can think about. Look at it sitting there all helpless and delicious.
Come on, you can do it!
...but maybe you don't have to. Maybe you could kill everyone that ever knew that you were on a diet, and then you could eat the cake guilt free?
No, no, no! Get a hold of yourself! Don't let your hunger define who you are!
See? Now you are feeling better, aren't you? You can step a little closer to that chocolate cake without losing control.
Now sniff it. Delicious, but not overwhelming. You could be around that cake for hours and...
What?
What's that?
Now you love that cake and want to keep it with you forever?
Hmm... sounds a bit unhealthy...
Nope, it's disgusting! You only want that piece of cake! It's all you can think about. Look at it sitting there all helpless and delicious.
Come on, you can do it!
...but maybe you don't have to. Maybe you could kill everyone that ever knew that you were on a diet, and then you could eat the cake guilt free?
No, no, no! Get a hold of yourself! Don't let your hunger define who you are!
See? Now you are feeling better, aren't you? You can step a little closer to that chocolate cake without losing control.
Now sniff it. Delicious, but not overwhelming. You could be around that cake for hours and...
What?
What's that?
Now you love that cake and want to keep it with you forever?
Hmm... sounds a bit unhealthy...
8 comments:
WAY TOO FUNNY!!!
I wanted to participate in this but could not come up with anything. Good job!
I am so sad you couldn't stay the rest of the evening.
Hopefully Joseph sleeps until 9:00.
Thanks for a fun evening!
This is hilarious!!! I knew you would come up with something great and I was right! I love this juxtaposition of Twlight and dieting ... and "let's kill everyone I know so I can eat my chocolate cake in peace." And the last line ... too classic. Thank you so much for playing! Reading this first thing helped get my day off to a fun start!
This was such a great idea! Very funny:) Chocolate cake, the ultimate temptation for us all! Love how you gave it the Twilight tension throughout.
that was great! i saw the challenge on jenners's blog but couldn't garner the strength (or wit) necessary to be so clever! love it!
How funny! Very clever combo.
that was good! but now I must go and get cake.
This is great! I love your idea- I thought about using Twilight- but I always talk about Twilight so thought I would give it a rest this time. Great job!
I think I preferred your adaption then the real Twilight book. Funny as heck, Caitlin. We were rolling..."maybe we can keep it with us forever."
Coolness.
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