Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Haikus for you(s)

A friend of mine pointed out today that I haven’t done any haikus on my blog in quite some time.  And she’s right!

I, for one, feel that there aren’t enough haikus fluttering around in this harsh world; and my blog has been Haiku-free long enough!


So, that got me to thinking; “What should I write a haiku about?”

I thought, and I thought, and then I blinked too long and almost fell asleep.

Woah, Nelly!”  I mumble, “Time for a cup of coffee!”

About that time, the fetus knees me in the cervix.

Drat!  I seem to be pregnant!"

Which means no afternoon coffee for me.

And, thus, Haiku #1 was born:



Oh, how I miss you,

Reduced birth-weight sounds just great!

My guilt holds me back.


There,” I thought, “Mission accomplished!”

And then I burped up some vomit.

Bile in your mouth: An unfortunate side effect of chronic heartburn.

“Sounds like a haiku!” you say?

I couldn’t agree more.


BURNING IN MY HEART   (Alternatively titled: WHY, GOD, WHY??)

My throat is aflame,

This kid had better have hair!

I hate stomach bile.


After several minutes of contemplation, I have yet to decide if “bile” is one syllable or two. 

I’m voting for one.

And you really shouldn’t argue with a chick who tastes vomit all day.


Ter said...

ah, just wait you'll be writing haikus during labor too!

Jen said...

you are just too much!

septembermom said...

You're too funny! Love these :)

britney said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you! I was having the worst morning and the second I got to work I checked your blog and these wonderful haikus perked me right up(Along with my huge cup of coffee). I was laughing so hard!

Jenners said...

Bile is one syllable. Yes.

And these are classic. I'm almost 100% sure these topics have never been covered in haiku before! BRAVO!

Kristin said...

My lattes were what I missed the most!