I am glad that you have been having a fun time in my uterus.
It’s warm, it’s cozy, it’s dark, you are getting non-stop chocolate through a mainline in your belly…what’s not to love? I get it.
Unfortunately (for you), you are no longer welcome in this place you call home.
You have ignored all of my repeated hints (have you noticed a lot of walks recently? A strange raspberry-leaf tea taste tainting the chocolate?) and you continue to sleep, poke my cervix, and grow fatter every day.
And so, Sonny-boy, it has come to this:
On Wednesday, you will be forced to exit the premises, permanently.
If you would like to leave of your own free will, you are welcome to at any time. But, if not, you are in for a BIG surprise on Wednesday when a lot of weeeeird things start happening.
Hey, I’m not happy about this either, but it has to be done.
Just thought I’d give you a heads up.
See you on Wednesday.