Tuesday, June 4, 2013

What You Need To Know


(note: I use the term “need to know” quite loosely. You don’t really need to know any of this.  But I choose to tell you anyway!)

About Joseph:


- Somehow, he has turned five and a half!   


- He drives his little brother crazy, and enjoys it.


- He loves his baby brother fiercely. 

He is always on board to talk to him/tickle him/snuggle him, and he tells me, literally, every day how “Lucky we are to have a baby in the house” and how he thinks “Samuel is the cutest, chubbiest baby in the whole world!”


- If you let him, he will play computer all. day. long. (we don’t let him)


- If he didn’t have a brother who wants to talk, and a Mama who institutes “Talking breaks,” he would talk  ALL THE TIME!

And about SO many things things! 

Boba Fett, God, math problems, the human body, “Do ninjas really live in China?”, “How come they chose those words to put on money?”…no topic is off the table. 



-He has an incredibly sweet, tender heart.


-On a related note- he sleeps with about 20 stuffed animals. (His current favorites are super soft kitties of various colors and sizes.  If you want to make him smile- buy him a stuffed kitty!) 

Some of them he is not so attached to anymore, but he doesn’t want to boot them off of his bed because “it might make them feel bad!” 

This came out after I made him choose an animal to put away (he had just gotten a new one) and I made the chosen exiled pet wave to him and say, “I will miss you, Joseph!” 

Tears ensued, and he cried, “That’s what I was afraid of!!”

Mom fail on that one.



-He sleeps with two “soft blankies.”  Not ONE….TWO.


- Also don’t forget to turn on the bat signal, the hallway light, the moon-to-sun night, and crack the door, or be prepared to come back and set things right.


- Sheets must be smoothed.  No tangles or wrinkles.  Smooooth.    A nice “cover fluffer” before bed will delight him.  Don’t worry, he will wake you up later if he gets tangled again!


- He also needs a tuck in kiss and hug from his Mama.  If his kiss on my cheek doesn’t land right, he will redo it several times.


- He loves morning snuggles.


- EARLY morning snuggles.


- Starts almost EVERY sentence with “Mama?…”


- The only main dish meal items he likes are:  Hamburgers (no lettuce/tomato/onion and EXTRA pickles), macaroni (sometimes), pbj, Double Noodle Soup, Chicken nuggets (if you have lots of ketchup), plain noodles, homemade bean/cheese burritos (easy on the beans),  pbj, pancakes/waffles, and white rice. 

Fruits: All of them!  Although watermelon can be a bit messy, so that is sometimes rejected, and oranges can “seem strange” to him (direct quote)  (I don’t know what it means either) if they are not peeled correctly.

Vegetables:  Cucumbers in circles with lots of ranch.  Corn on the cob, cut off (until he gets some in his teeth- then it is SO OVER).  Carrots in ketchup.

Sure glad that I started him out with vegetable baby food so that he would have healthy eating habits, love veggies and not develop a sweet tooth! (I read an article, see…)

(Samuel is getting bananas first.)


- Prefers showers to baths.


- Cries/whines about showers….cries/whines about having to get OUT of showers. 


- Always up for earning money.


- Crusts on.  Triangle-cut preferred.  Chunky peanut butter if there’s an option.


- Skin on apples.  Sliced.  Or whole until, you guessed it, skin gets stuck in his teeth.


- Bananas sliced and served with a toothpick for spearing.


-  Smells food first to see if he likes it.


- Calls slivers “slithers”.  Please don’t correct him of this adorableness!

And HEAVEN HELP YOU if he ever gets a “slither” because you will have to either try to remove it on the spot (He would prefer this be done without ACTUALLY TOUCHING the slither)   (yes this is impossible), or have everyone wonder why you dragging a screaming, limping, potentially physically disabled child to the car.


- Prays to himself.


- LOVES Legos- but not if Isaac is playing. (I don’t blame him)


- Reads at least 10 books a day.


- Tells me that he loves me 20 times a day.


- Plays chess with himself.


- Told me the other day, “When I am a parent I am going to be waaaaay nicer than you are.”


- Told me today, “You are kind of chubby, Mama.  And its cute, like Samuel is chubby.”


- I LOVE him so much it hurts.





Maureen said...

THAT ENTRY IS A KEEPSAKE you are going to TREASURE again and again sweet Momma! And such unbelievable great photos to go with it! LOVED IT and that beautiful blue eyed boy!!!

Robyn said...

This makes me want to hug you and him! Sweet sweet boy. So much of this is exactly Braeden. We must get these two together ASAP. I need to do this for my boy, I don't want to forget all of his little quirks. This made me so happy!

Robyn said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
T Rex Mom said...

Delightful young man. We have no talking breaks, too. He and T would be best friends, I just know it. However, he would struggle with the waking up early but T also sleeps with a group of "babies" and was quite distraught when his sister informed him today I was donating some of their babies. Don't worry, none of the sleeping with ones.

Caitlin said...

oh, sweet boy! I want to hug him!

ter@waaoms said...

I definitely needed to know all those things about Joseph! :)