Tonight, instead of our usual Thursday’s Culinary Adventure, we will be embarking on an adventure of a different kind.
Hint: It is expensive, some people claim it is a scam, and it involves urine.
Well, I’ll just have to tell you…
It’s the Intelligender test!
For those of you who have never heard of this test, let me briefly explain:
You pee in a cup, dump it into this test tube thingy, twirl it around, and based on what color your urine turns, it is supposed to tell you if you are having a boy or a girl, when you are as early as 10 weeks pregnant.
Doesn’t that sound fun?
Doesn’t that sound sketchy?
The website claims that it is 80% effective, oddly enough, and since I don’t care what we are having, I figured that I wouldn’t be that disappointed if it turned out to be wrong.
For reasons that I am sure you can all imagine, I did not take step-by-step pictures of me on this adventure.
But, I did take a picture of the result: Please brace yourselves for viewing pictures of my urine. See how much I love you all?
See, as long as the pee turns green, and matches one shade of the color on the label, then it is a boy. The words don’t actually show up, they are already there and you just have to match.
Here is what it had to match to be a girl
Pretty close, right? Like, disconcertingly close?
Couldn’t they have chosen pink and blue?
In person, though, you could tell that it had a green hue, and none of the “Girl” colors matched really.
I looked online at some sample results, and it looked like a lot of the “Boy” results were really dark green and a little smoky/cloudy (They were all further along than me though…).
The “Girl” results ranged from light orange to a bright orange.
And the label said that any green means boy, even if it isn’t “Smoky”. (And really, who wants to have smoky urine? Isn’t green urine bad enough?)
So…I’m going with boy for now.
But, here’s the thing.
Assuming that the test is 80% effective:
-Since I took the test on the earlier side (12.5 weeks), I am going to, realistically take the % down to about 75%.
-Then, I saw on their website that a BOY result is less accurate than a GIRL result, for some reason. If it says GIRL, it is pretty sure, BOY, not so much. SOOOOO… since mine said BOY, I’m going to take it on down to 70%.
-And, lastly, since my result was pretty light…I’m going to say that it is probably about 65% effective.
Which, let’s face it, is hardly better than guessing. I was already at 50%.
Or, as I said to Brian this morning, “Congratulations, you MAY or MAY NOT be having another son.”
I should have baked something instead.